A Cheesehead and an Engineer in Namibia...: Animal Crackers

After flying, swimming, boozing and cruising, we were ready for a change, so we packed our backpacks and headed for Botswana, specifically, Chobe National Park, for a night of camping in the bush. We took a bus to the border, where the Chobe river feeds into the Zambezi and waited on the dusty shore where Zambia, Zimbabwe, Botswana, and Namiba could all be seen from the single point.

After a transfer boat, a ride into town, and multiple other stops that seemed to take all morning, we arrived at a resort where we launched onto the Chobe river to view the game from the water. The boat hugged the shoreline moving upstream, and immediately hippos could be spotted, their snorts spraying into the air. Hippos are known to kill more people than any other animal in region as they are territorial. Wandering too close may cause them to charge and ram your boat, which always added a little excitement when one would dive below the dark water.

Within the park, the Chobe river divides into two channels creating a large grassy island of an almost lime green color. Large groupings of Impala were scattered all along the island into the distance. These light brown animals resemble a miniature deer, lighter in color, with black striping on its tail and hind legs that resemble a McDonalds logo. They appeared to be the most common animal, especially among other deerlike animals such as the Kudu, and one other that we call “That thing with a circle on its butt.” Crocodiles like to eat Impala when they swim from the lime island to the mainland. Chevrolet likes to build them.

Way off in the distance, there appeared to be elephants. OMG, turn the boat, can’t miss the elephants! I believe we used up an entire memory card on elephant #1 when we finally saw him. Little did we know that roughly 70,000 elephants made habitat in Chobe.

The boat ride lasted about 2 hours, and we got a great taste of the wildlife. Some of our safari companions noted that viewing game from a boat was a unique new experience. There were locations where hippos, crocodiles, impala, and elephants were all in the same frame of view. At one location, in a grassy inlet of shallow water, 40 hippos wading, when out from beneath shot a brave crocodile, apparently trying to catch a fish lunch underneath their feet, causing a huge disruption and contortion of the mass. “This is why this is the best park in the world” our river guide told us many times.

Our companions included two brothers, originally from South Carolina (younger brother wore a salt stained Gamecocks hat) who moved to South Africa in their youth and never returned stateside. They were in marketing for industrial manufacturing and thus had very nice cameras and video equipment, because nothing says industrial manufacturing like a safari at sunset. They were big likeable guys with big fingers used for wiping sunscreen from each other’s faces in the morning.

We also traveled with some friendly Canadian teachers who taught Egyptian children for a Canadian school in Egypt. We were confused as well, but apparently the schools are popular for families who want children to learn English. They drive past the pyramids on their way to work every day.

Lastly, was a couple from England and their South African friend, a very pleasant trio who we enjoyed talking too about worldly food and legless night monsters that harassed the campsite.

The safari consisted of slow drives down tight, rugged, dirt roads, head on a swivel, looking for elusive predators, stopping frequently to watch the families of elephants, impala, baboons, and water buffalo. Offshoot roads split down along the Chobe river, where we had boated previously, and where the best viewing could be seen.

You know the scene in Dances with Wolves where Kevin Costner (at his best) crests a hill to view the plains of golden grasses scattered with distant grazing herds of Buffalo? Well, the main score from the soundtrack subconsciously played in our heads when turning onto those river spurs. Though, we did observe water buffalo (which is relatively rare) the masses of elephant spreading along the wide and distant grassy banks were astounding. While looking at 25 or more of them on one side of the truck, another 5 would come crashing out of the brush on the other side. We had some encounters that felt frightening, but must have been safe because our guide showed no sign of concern. We literally could have plugged their snouts with peanuts.

We got lucky too. During one of the drives, through an alley of open brush, a Leopard was spotted, stalking a pack of Impala. It was difficult to see, but young brother Olsen showed us a zoomed photo on his camera, where you could see the cat’s mouth open, practically drooling.

Giraffe necks would show up in the late afternoon, wandering around like aliens. We saw two males play-fighting by flinging their necks at each other, tangling them in a braid momentarily.

In between drives, we would go to the campsite, set back far in the bush, away from the water, where we would be fed under a canvas tent by the safari crew. The camp also had our heavy sleeping tents, and a four canvas walled enclosure with a five foot hole in the ground, makeshift toilet seat, pile of dirt, and a shovel.

The food was great and plentiful. Macaroni with salad, chicken stew, granola and yogurt, sandwiches, coffee, wine, water, and high tea. At night we sat around the fire, half the time in silence, listening to the abundant wildlife. Taking a note from Krysta’s inquiries to the rafting driver, and to break the silence, Luke asked the guide if the truck had ever been charged by an elephant. The guide stood up and walked by the cooks in lieu of a response.

Sleeping was hot. Krysta spent the night staring at the ceiling of the tent simply listening to the sounds of the surrounding darkness. Besides the dripping sound from Luke’s sweat, at various points she heard the true Ghost In The Darkness, king of the jungle, roaring in a nocturnal hunt. She also heard the stomping of elephants, and the cackle of hyenas likely on their way to scavenge the dead elephant we saw the following morning. Krysta was tired the next day. Luke was sweaty.

In the morning, we slowly drove out the brothers and the teachers, and were treated to a very rare sight, a pack of wild dogs along one of the river roads. Apparently, what makes them special is that they are indigenous to the region, and are very low in number. At one point, they started to chase impalas, but gave up upon finding a shady respite.

We enjoyed another lunch and 2 more drives before being dropped back off for another river safari, this time just Krysta, Luke, and Captain “T”. Captain “T” was a great guy who had a very genuine passion for elephants. We learned that at around 5 years, mother elephants kick out the boys so they do not inbreed with their female siblings. Such inbreeding causes some elephants to be born without trunks, thus allowing them to survive only as long as they are nursed by the mothers. After that, they cannot feed or drink without the crucial appendage.

So after thousands of elephants and impalas, we made our way back to Zamibia for a final night, drinking a couple beers at a hostel, reminiscing on drowning and elephants.

There is no better way to top off a memorable trip like boarding a sold out double decker bus with broken air conditioning. Luke drank 5 bottles of water and a Fanta and left all of it sopping into the fabric of the bus seat, loosing weight through sweat. We ended up arriving 3 hours behind schedule because border security measures and intermittent security check points all along the way. Upon crossing Namibia, every person had their luggage searched. The only thing they found in our luggage was Krysta’s exploded shampoo. At another checkpoint, a man jumped out of the luggage trailer, which both we and the guards thought was odd, resulting in an extended delay baking in the sun while immigration authorities and the bus drivers fought over the apparent, attempted, smuggle. "We trusted you in 2010", an immigration authority screamed at one of the bus drivers. It was a horribly memorable experience. Upon arrival, we took a cab home, drove the POS Rav-4 to drop Krysta off at work, then drove the POS Rav-4 to the best service center in town, where it still remains, two weeks later, frustrating the service manager.